Thursday, January 26, 2012

easing into the new year...

We have settled in well with the new routine at the new day care. I am leaving a little later in the mornings, which is great as things are no longer as rushed as before. I am able to get ready at a decent pace and enjoy breakfast and coffee at home. It does mean lots of morning and afternoon traffic though, but so far things have been manageable. The boy seems to be adjusting well too - still clingy most mornings, but it does not seem to be a matter of wanting to leave, more of wanting me to hang around. But I generally leave quite soon so as not to make things harder for him (and me).

We also started at a new swimming school two weeks ago and things are going great there too. He is now having one-on-one lessons. Generally he seems to co-operate, but sometimes he will just refuse to do something – this week it was blowing bubbles, which was according to him “sleeping”.

The Big Boy Bed is going well too. It has been over a month now. He has gotten out a couple of times. He is quite a funny one – the first night he walked into our room really slowly and then ran to me open armed. This week he walked into our room backwards... I had to laugh, he then turned around and ran to me open armed (again, it is cute) with the biggest grin on his face. He also talks in his sleep, which I used to do when I was little. Last night he kept asking for hi iPad, “I want iPad, I want iPad, I want xxx’s iPad”.

This year has started off with a bang - we have been busy busy busy. I have a few weekend play dates lines up (this weekend, another the following weekend, two second birthday parties, a baby shower, and a camping weekend (what am I getting myself into!). This has been slightly intentional - wanting to get out there and socialise more. The camping trip - well, that is another story. Camping is so not my thing - but I was told that my boy will enjoy it, and that apparently it is going to be fun and really relaxing. I will have to see about that... Generally I am excited about it that is when I am talking about it and thinking about all the fun I could have, but then when I have time to sit and think I wonder what on earth I am getting myself into!

CGMS needs to go on again. This time with a LOT more discipline. I had a little shock when I got another box in December from my local pharmacy - there price was substantially higher than the postal pharmacy I use for my pump supplies.

Monday, January 16, 2012

the one about friendship

During my holidays I read "MWF seeking BFF" by Rachel Bertche, and naturally friendship was on my mind a lot, just in general, as well as my own circle of friends too. I do not have a lot of friends around where I live. I used to have more, but as I got older, and we entered different life stages at different time, these started to dwindle. Reading the book made me realise too that perhaps I do not put enough time into making new friends, and staying in touch with old friends. So I decided that this year I really want to change that.

This weekend my boy was invited to a kiddie’s birthday party and I thought that this may be the perfect opportunity to meet more people with kids. I was not going to know many people there - in actual fact I had only met the dad before, and would know one other parent (who thankfully came). But at this party I was once again reminded about how our city is viewed when it comes to friendships. During the holidays friends from Joburg were down and we met for a day of beach and food. They started to talk about that mentioning that they found people to be less friendly, and more "clique-y", something I have heard people say before. A few years back I may not have agreed with that - that is when I had a larger group of friends. I have to admit, for the first while I was at the party I felt like the odd one out. A group of moms were all sitting together under the trees chatting. Not many dads around. I was actually quite happy when I kept on being pulled to the sandpit or trampoline by my son. One dad struck up conversation, and that was it. The rest of the party I hung with the other mom I had met before (She did not know anyone else either). The other moms pretty much sat in their little circle chatting and did not seem to include anyone else they did not know - I did go sit around them, and probably felt too intimidated to just join the conversation, and nobody else made any effort.

I guess this can be seen from both sides. I did not try making more of an effort - although I guess in a way I felt that perhaps they would / should, as it was obvious that I had arrived alone, and they all knew one another already. I don't think, or at least I don't want to believe, that it is in actual fact that bad that one would not be able to make new friends, or "break into" already established circles of friends. In the past 2 years I have made one great friend, who lives up the road, has one kid that is my boy's age. This all makes for great company - besides our kids' ages we have a lot more in common too. So we can meet over weekends with kids for play dates or outings, dinner, and sometimes a lunch without kids.

Two more moms I met in the past two years I would like to try keeping more contact with. And the mom at the party this weekend - she seems great and today we have arranged a tentative date to meet in about two weeks.

I have a couple more friends I have met online, but whose friendship has gone beyond the online space. I hope that things can grow with the ones who live close by.

This is by no means New Year’s resolutions, and I am not planning on embarking on anything the scale of what Rachel Bertche did. But her book has given me some perspective, and made me realise that perhaps I am not the only one who feels the way I do.

I will admit though that my greatest fear with issues such as these is getting hurt, or not being accepted.